I learned a lesson in marketing from a man who bought an old
boat, a trailer, and a motor from me. "Thanks," he said as
he loaded them up. "I'm planning to resell them."
Good luck, I thought. I had been trying to get rid of them
for months. But when I ran into him a few weeks later, he'd
sold everything.
"How did you manage that?" I marveled.
"I took out an ad: 'Heavy-duty boat trailer with free boat.'
When the buyer came to get it, I asked if he had a motor. He
said no. I told him I happened to have one in my garage.
Bought that, too."
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Workaholic
As an attorney in a major New Mexico law firm, I have many colleagues
who work long hours.
However, the reputation of one of my partners' workaholic ways even
extended beyond the office. He not only had to leave work early one
day because of a medical problem, but was also told by his doctor to
stay home until the end of the week.
My colleague grudgingly agreed to comply. In the middle of the week,
our receptionist received a call for him.
She announced that the partner was out of the office until Friday.
"Good," the caller said. "That's all I wanted to know." It was my
partner's doctor.
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Curious Chimp
Passing by the primate area one day, a zoo attendant happens
to notice a chimpanzee sitting on a rock with an open book
in either hand, looking first at one and then at the other.
Upon closer examination, he identifies the books: the Bible
and Darwin's Origin of Species.
Curious, he asks the chimp, "What's with the books?"
The chimp replies, "I'm trying to decide whether I'm my
brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."
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Speeding Ticket
A West Virginia state trooper, stopped a woman for going 15 miles
over the speed limit. After he handed her a ticket, she asked him,
"Don't you give out warnings?"
"Yes, ma'am," he replied. "They're all up and down the road. They
say, 'Speed Limit 55.'"
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"Swallowed a Coin"
The kid had swallowed a coin and it got stuck in his throat, and his mother ran out in the street yelling for help. A man passing by took the boy by his shoulders and hit him with a few strong strokes on the back, and he coughed the coin out.
"I don't know how to thank you, doctor," his mother started.
"I'm not a doctor," the man replied. "I'm from the IRS."
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@CleanPun
Frank hadn't been to a class reunion in decades.
When he walked into this latest one, he thought he recognized a woman over in the corner, so he approached her and extended his hand in greeting, saying, "You look like Helen Brown."
"Well," the woman snapped back, "you don't look so great in blue, either!"
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@One Liner
"As a teenager you are in the last stage of life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you."
~Fran Lebowitz
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@~Fran Lebowitz
CleanQuote
“The Christian faith has not been tried and found wanting. It has rather been found difficult and left untried.”
~ Chesterton
~ Chesterton
CleanQuote
“The Christian faith has not been tried and found wanting. It has rather been found difficult and left untried.”
~ Chesterton
~ Chesterton