Cat Petting
We moved into an apartment while we were looking for a place that
would let us keep our pets. We could not have our pets at our
apartment, so my brother-in-law kept our cat for us until we could
find a place that would let us keep him.
One day he came home after dark and saw the cat on the porch eating.
He reached down to pet him and while he was petting him he looked
over toward the fence where he saw MY cat sitting. Looking back
around to see what he was petting he realized that it was a raccoon
that had come up to eat the cat food. After that the cat was fed in the house.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Rest Home Trial"
Aunt Mary, a spinster of 92, had finally consented to go to a rest home, but strictly on a two-week-trial basis. Consequently, she took a small overnight case with only the bare essentials.
A couple of days later her niece was surprised to get a phone call from her demanding more clothes.
"Please bring me that good black silk, my lavender print, the brown wool..." and she went on and on. Finally after a brief questioning from her niece, Aunt Mary expostulated:
"There are MEN in this place!"
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CleanQuote
"I don't do drugs anymore 'cause I find I get the same effect just standing up really fast."