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Paid in Full
A woman was getting swamped with calls from strangers. The reason? A
billing service had launched an 800 number that was identical to hers. When
she called to complain, she was told to get a new number.
"I've had mine for twenty years," she pleaded. "Couldn't you change yours?"
The company refused, so she said, "Fine. From now on, I'm going to tell
everyone who calls that their bill is paid in full."
The company got a new number the next day.
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Two Kids
Checking out of the grocery store, I noticed that the bag boy was eyeing my two adopted children curiously. They often draw scrutiny, since my son's a blond Russian, while my daughter has shiny black Haitian skin.
The boy continued staring as he carried our groceries to the car. Finally, he asked, "Are those your kids?"
"Yes, they are!" I answered proudly.
"They adopted?" he asked.
"Yes," I replied.
"I thought so," he concluded. "I figured you're too old to have kids that small."
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Here is today's CleanQuote.
"Forgive me my nonsense as I also forgive the nonsense of those who think they talk sense." - Robert Frost
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Appearance of Evil
A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband wants to have a snack at the restaurant, but his wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to their room to rest.
She lies down on the bed... just then, a train passes by very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she's thrown out of the bed.
Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more. Again a train shakes the room so violently, she's pitched to the floor.
Exasperated, she calls the front desk, asks for the manager. The manager says he'll be right up.
The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true. "Look... lie here on the bed -- you'll be thrown right to the floor!" So he lies down next to the wife.
Just then the husband walks in. He yells, "What are you doing here!?!"
The manager calmly replies, "Would you believe I'm waiting for a train?"