The girlfriend and I were sitting around after lunch Sunday
afternoon and discussing what to do with the rest of the
day.
"How about a movie?" I suggested.
"A movie? On such a gorgeous day? Why don't we go horseback
riding?"
"Sorry. I am not climbing on the back of a fifteen hundred
pound animal that is not smart enough not to kill me if it
gets startled by a car horn or something."
"Don't be such a sissy," she criticized. "The horses they
give beginners are very tame. Besides, it's fun!"
I stared at her with as straight a face as I could manage
and said, "I don't see how you can be so cavalier about
getting on a horse."
ZING!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cooking a Roast
One day a little girl was watching her mom make a roast
beef. She cut off the ends, wrapped it in string, seasoned
it, and set it in the roasting pan.
The little girl asked her mom why she cut off the ends of
the roast. Mom replied, after some thought, that it was the
way that her mother had done it.
That night Grandma came to dinner and the little girl and
her mom went to her and asked why she had cut the end off of
the roast before cooking. After some thought, Grandma
replied that it was the way her mother had done it.
Now the great-grandmother was quite old and in a nursing
home. But the little girl went with her mom and grandma to
see her and again asked the question.
Great-Grandma looked at them a bit annoyed and said, "So it
would fit in the pan, of course."
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Job Application
An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the
question, "Have you ever been arrested?" he wrote, "No."
The next question, intended for people who had answered in the
affirmative to the previous question, was "Why?"
The applicant answered it anyway: "Never got caught."
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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