Hashing It Out
I was working as a short-order cook at two restaurants in the same
neighborhood. On a Saturday night, I was finishing up the dinner
shift at one restaurant and hurrying to report to work at the second
place, but I was delayed because one table kept sending back an order
of hash browns, insisting they were cold. I replaced them several
times, but still the customers were dissatisfied.
When I was able to leave, I raced out the door and arrived at my
second job. A server immediately handed me my first order.
"Make sure these hash browns are hot," she said, "because these
people just left a restaurant down the street that kept serving them
cold ones."
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"Terrorist Warning "
We've been notified by Building Security that there have been 4 suspected terrorists working at our office. Three of the four have been apprehended. Bin Sleepin, Bin Loafin, and Bin Drinkin have been taken into custody.
Security advised us that they could find no one fitting the description of the fourth cell member, Bin Workin, in the office.
Police are confident that anyone who looks like he's Bin Workin will be very easy to spot.
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A Few Laughs About Texas
A visitor asked a West Texas cowboy, "Do you ever get tornadoes out
here?" The cowboy replied, "Yeah, we had one a while back, but it ran
into a sandstorm outside of town and got ripped to pieces."
A visitor asked a West Texas cowboy, "Doesn't it ever rain out here?"
The cowboy replied, "Sure. There was a half-inch of rain a couple of
weeks ago just a few miles north of here, but I was too busy and
couldn't go."
The wind blows so hard out in West Texas that at a drive-in theater it
once blew Gene Autry right out of the saddle."
A little brown hen once got caught in a West Texas sandstorm. She was
flying through the air backward so fast that she laid the same egg
three times.
It was so windy that prairie dogs were digging holes 40 feet in the air.
It was so dry that the Baptists were sprinkling, the Methodists were
spitting, and the Catholics were giving rain checks.
It was so hot that I saw a roadrunner pull a worm out of the ground
using pot holders.
It was so cold that a farmer threw a dipperful of water and it froze
in midair and knocked a pup unconscious.
A visitor to Amarillo asked a local rancher, "How do you stand the
wind blowing every single day?" The rancher said, "You just have to
get used to it - learn to lean into it. In fact, one day last fall the
wind stopped blowing all of a sudden, and all the chickens in the
panhandle plumb fell over."
During a period of heavy sandstorms, a rancher visited his banker and
applied for a loan. The banker warned him, "I'll have to come out and
inspect the property first." The rancher replied, "That won't be
necessary. Here it comes now."
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Psych:
Two psychiatrists were at a convention. As they conversed over a
drink, one asked, "What was your most difficult case?"
The other replied, "I had a patient who lived in a pure fantasy world.
He believed that an uncle in South America was going to die and leave
him a fortune. All day long he waited for a letter to arrive from an
attorney. He never went out, he never did anything, he merely sat
around and waited for this fantasy letter from this fantasy uncle.
Iworked with this man eight years."
"What was the result?"
"It was an eight-year struggle. Every day for eight years, but I
finally cured him. And then that stupid letter arrived!"