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There was this truck driver who had to deliver five hundred penguins to the state zoo. As he was driving his truck through the desert, the truck breaks down. After waiting by the side of the road for about three hours he waves another truck down and offers the driver $500 to take these penguins to the state zoo for him.
The next day the first truck driver arrives in town and sees the second truck driver crossing the road with 500 penguins walking in single file behind him.
The first truck driver jumps out of his truck and says, "What's going on?I gave you $500 to take these penguins to the zoo!"
The second truck driver replies, "I did take them to the zoo. And I had enough money left over so now we're going to see a movie."
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It was autumn, and the Indians on the remote reservation asked their new Chief if the winter was going to be cold or mild.
Since he was an Indian Chief in a modern society, he had never been taught the old secrets, and when he looked at the sky, he couldn't tell what the weather was going to be.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he replied to his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect wood to be prepared. But also being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is the coming winter going to be cold?"
"It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold indeed," the meteorologist at the weather service responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood in order to be prepared.
A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. "Is it going to be a very cold winter?"
"Yes," the man at National Weather Service again replied, "it's definitely going to be a very cold winter."
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of wood they could find.
Two weeks later, he called the National Weather Service again. "Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?"
"Absolutely," the man replied. "It's going to be one of the coldest winters ever."
"How can you be so sure?" the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, "The Indians are collecting wood like crazy."
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Concentrating
I was talking to my preacher I noticed he had cut himself shaving.
I asked him about it. He said he was concentrating on his sermon and nicked his chin.
I told him next time to concentrate on what he was doing and cut his sermon.
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From the Mouth of a 6-year-old
My mother teaches first grade in a small town. One day, she took all her students down the hall to the restroom at once so as not to be disturbed every 5 minutes for a bathroom break. As first-graders tend to dawdle, she urged them to "hurry up and take care of business" so they could get back to the classroom.
One young man looked up at her and, in all seriousness said, "Teacher, I don't have any unfinished business."