Didn't See That Coming
The minister's little six-year-old girl had been so naughty during
the week that her mother decided to give her the worst kind of
punishment. She told her she couldn't go to the Sunday School Picnic
on Saturday.
When the day came, her mother felt she had been too harsh and changed
her mind. When she told the little girl she could go to the picnic,
the child's reaction was one of gloom and unhappiness.
"What's the matter? I thought you'd be glad to go to the picnic." her
mother said.
"It's too late!" the little girl said. "I've already prayed for rain."
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Help Changing a Tire
A kind-hearted motorist saw a man struggling to change a
tire alongside the highway, and he pulled over to see
whether he could help. The man had a very red face and a
dark smear across it where he'd wiped off sweat with dirty
hands. His tie was undone and his shirt collar was askew,
and it was clear he had also wiped his hands on his
once-white shirt. Close to him stood an immaculately neat
woman who was speaking in quick, agitated tones.
"Hello, there," said the motorist. "Say, I've changed a lot
of tires ... maybe I can help here."
"You sure can," the man with the flat tire replied wearily.
"My wife is an expert, too. If you will just do all the
arguing with her about how this tire ought to be changed, I
can concentrate on the dirty work and get the job done."
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Impartiality
A friend of mine had just become a district court judge and was
nervous about presiding impartially over his first criminal trial. As
a former prosecutor, he could see the preponderance of evidence was
clearly against the defendant.
The proceedings went smoothly, until it was time for him to instruct the jury.
"The jury," he began, "is to convene in the guilty room."