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A retired man who volunteers to entertain patients in nursing homes and hospitals went to Maimonides Hospital in Brooklyn and took his portable keyboard along. He told some jokes and sang some funny songs at patients' bedsides.
When he finished he said, in farewell, "I hope you get better."
One elderly gentleman replied, "I hope you get better, too."
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While serving as associate pastor in a church in the California gold country, I had an elderly gentlemen attend some of our Bible studies.
When he missed one week, I called to see if he was alright. He told me he had started to feel sick, but a friend had told him of a natural supplement that had helped him to get better right away.
When I asked what it was, he said it was available at health food stores and was like a natural antibiotic. I again asked what this wonder supplement was called and he said, (meaning Echinacea) "Euthanasia, I think."
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The Diary
Linda: "What's that you're reading?"
Jill: "A diary."
Linda: What's in it?
Jill: "I can't tell you that. A diary is a highly personal and
confidential affair, It has important secret dreams and secret
yearnings. It's private. It's not meant to be shared lightly with other
people. And besides, this diary belongs to Margaret."
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A Texan is in a bar with his dog, watching the Oklahoma vs. Texas game. The longhorns surprisingly score a field goal and the dog barks repeatedly. The bartender looks at the dog in awe.
After a long while the longhorns score a touchdown and the dog does flips and dances across the bar.Then, the bartender looks at the guy and says, "Man that's amazing. What does your dog do when Texas beats Oklahoma?"The guy replied, "I don't know, I've only had him 5 years."
Bill