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Playing golf with his buddies, my grandfather had to make a slick 45-foot, downhill putt. As he lined it up, he announced, "I have a dollar bill that says I can make this putt. Does anyone want to bet?"
His three friends eagerly agreed to the wager. My grandfather missed the putt by ten feet, and his friends gathered around to collect their money. Granddad pulled out a dollar bill on which he had printed, "I can make this putt."
His pals are still trying to collect on the bet; my grandfather is too.
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I don't recall where I first read this,it may have been daily Humor, but I've had a copy of it in my drafts folder for some time now. Hope you enjoy it.
Good Dog...
A Baptist preacher and his wife decided to get a new
dog. Ever mindful of the congregation, they knew the
dog must also be a Baptist. They visited kennel after
kennel and explained their needs. Finally, they found
a kennel whose owner assured them he had just the dog
they wanted.
The owner brought the dog to meet the pastor and his
wife. "Fetch the Bible," he commanded.
The dog bounded to the bookshelf, scrutinized the
books, located the Bible, and brought it to the owner.
"Now find Psalm 23," he commanded.
The dog dropped the Bible to the floor, and showing
marvelous dexterity with his paws, leafed through and
finding the correct passage, pointed to it with his
paw.
The pastor and his wife were very impressed and
purchased the dog.
That evening, a group of church members came to visit.
The pastor and his wife began to show off the dog,
having him locate several Bible verses. The visitors
were very impressed.
One man asked, "Can he do regular dog tricks, too?"
"I haven't tried yet," the pastor replied.
He pointed his finger at the dog. "HEEL!" the pastor
commanded. The dog immediately jumped on a chair,
placed one paw on the pastor's forehead and began to
howl.
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NO CHEATING!
Don't scroll down until you choose
Which one are you?
No cheating. Pick your dessert, then look to see what psychiatrists think about you!
After taking this dessert personality test, send this e-mail on to others, but when you do, be sure to put your choice of dessert in the subject box above.
If all of the desserts listed below were sitting in front of you, which would you choose? (Sorry you can only pick one)
*Angel Food Cake
*Brownies
*Lemon Meringue Pie
*Vanilla Cake with Chocolate Icing
*Strawberry Short Cake
*Chocolate on Chocolate
*Ice Cream
*Carrot Cake
NO ... You can't change your mind once you scroll down!
So think carefully, what your choice will be!
OK - Now that you've made your choice, this is what research says about you!
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Angel Food Cake. . . Sweet, loving, cuddly. You love all warm and fuzzy items. A little nutty at times.
Sometimes you need an ice cream cone at the end of the day. Others perceive you as being childlike and immature at times.
Brownies. . . You are adventurous, love new ideas, are a champion of underdogs and a slayer of dragons. When tempers flare up, you whip out your saber. You are always the oddball with a unique sense of humor and direction. You tend to be very loyal.
Lemon Meringue Pie. . . Smooth, sexy, & articulate with your hands, you are an excellent after-dinner speaker and a good teacher. But don't try to walk and chew gum at the same time. A bit of a diva at times, but you have many friends.
Vanilla Cake with Chocolate Icing. . . Fun-loving, sassy, humorous. Not very grounded in life; very indecisive and lack motivation.
Everyone enjoys being around you, but you are a practical joker. Others should be cautious in making you mad. However, you are a friend for life.
Strawberry Short Cake. . . Romantic, warm, loving. You care about other people and can be counted on in a pinch. You tend to melt. You can be overly emotional and annoying at times.
Chocolate on Chocolate. . . Sexy, always ready to give and receive. Very creative, adventurous, ambitious, and passionate.
You have a cold exterior but are warm on the inside.
Not afraid to take chances.
You will not settle for anything average in life. Love to laugh.
Ice Cream. . . You like sports, whether it be baseball, football, basketball, or soccer. If you could, you would like to participate, but you enjoy watching sports. You don't like to give up the remote control. You tend to be self-centered and high maintenance.
Carrot Cake. . . You are a very fun loving person, who likes to laugh. You are fun to be with. People like to hang out with you. You are a very warm hearted person and a little quirky at times. You have many loyal friends.