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Mother decided that 10-year-old Cathy should get something 'practical' for her birthday.
"Suppose we open a savings account for you?" mother suggested. Cathy was delighted.
"It's your account, darling," mother said as they arrived at the bank, "so you fill out the application."
Cathy was doing fine until she came to the space for 'Name of your former bank.' After a slight hesitation, she put down 'Piggy.'
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Honeymoon in England
On a visit to my wife's native England for our honeymoon, we arrived at
London's Gatwick Airport.
My new bride headed for the British passport control line while I, an
American, waited in the foreigners' line. When my turn came, the customs
officer asked me the purpose of my visit.
"Pleasure," I replied. "I'm on my honeymoon."
The officer looked first to one side of me, then the other. "That's very
interesting, sir," he said as he stamped my passport. "Most men bring
their wives with them."
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A little girl went up to her mother one day while holding her stomach saying, "Mommy, my stomach hurts."
Her mother replied, "That's because it's empty. You have to put something into it!" She then prepared a bowl of soup.
Later that day the pastor and his wife came over for dinner. The pastor began to feel bad. Holding his head he said, "I have such a terrible headache!"
The little girl looked up at him, giving him the sweetest smile that any little child could give. Then she said, "That's because it's empty. You have to put something into it!"
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*Grandpa's Pearls of Wisdom*
- Whether a man winds up with the nest egg or a goose egg depends a lot on the kind of chick he marries.
- Trouble in marriage often starts when a man gets so busy earnin' his salt that he forgets his sugar.
- Too many couples marry for better or for worse, but not for good.
- When a man marries a woman, they become one but the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
- If a man has enough "horse sense" to treat his wife like a thoroughbred, she will never be an old nag.
- Judgin' from the specimens they pick for husbands, it's no wonder that brides often blush.
- On anniversaries the wise husband always forgets the past...but never the present.
- A foolish husband remarked to his wife: "Honey, you stick to the washin', ironin', cookin', and scrubbin'. No wife of mine is gonna work."
- The bonds of matrimony are a good investment only when the interest is kept up.
- Many girls like to marry a military man--he can cook, sew, make beds, and is in good health...and he's already used to taking orders.