Scrubbing Bulkheads
I was scrubbing a bulkhead on the USS Kitty Hawk one Sunday morning
when the loud-speaker announced:
"Religious services. Maintain silence about the decks. Discontinue
all unnecessary work."
An hour later, the opinion many of us held regarding our daily
routine, was confirmed with this announcement:
"Resume all unnecessary work."
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Q: If April showers bring May flowers, then what do May flowers bring?
A: Pilgrims!
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A vacationer e-mailed a seaside hotel to ask its location.
“It’s only a stone’s throw away from the beach,” he was told.
“But how will I recognize it?” asked the man.
Back came the reply: “It’s the one with all the broken windows.”
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Counting Rabbits
Teacher: If I give you two rabbits and two rabbits and
another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?
Paddy: Seven!
Teacher: No, listen carefully again. If I give you two
rabbits and two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many
rabbits have you got?
Paddy: Seven!
Teacher: Let's try this another way. If I give you two
apples and two apples and another two apples, how many
apples have you got?
Paddy: Six.
Teacher: Good. Now if I give you two rabbits and two rabbits
and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got?
Paddy: Seven!
Teacher: How on earth do you work out that three lots of two
rabbits is seven?
Paddy: I've already got one rabbit at home now!