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A sweet grandmother telephoned Mount Sinai Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"
The operator said "I'll be glad to help, Dear. What's the
name and room number?"
The grandmother in her weak tremulous voice said, "Holly
Finkel in room 302."
The Operator replied, "Let me check. Oh, good news. Her
records say that Holly is doing very well. Her blood
pressure is fine; her blood work just came back as normal
and her physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged on Tuesday."
The Grandmother said, "Thank you. That's wonderful! I was
so worried! God bless you for the good news."
The operator replied, "You're more than welcome. Is Holly
your daughter?"
The Grandmother said, "No, I'm Holly Finkel in 302.
Dr.Cohen doesn't tell me anything!"
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Warning Labels!
7 Up:Contents under pressure. Cap may blow off causing eye or other serious injury. Point away from face and people, especially when opening.
Vicks Ny-Quil Gel Caps:Use of this product in conjunction with alcohol or sedatives may cause drowsiness.
Jonsreds Chainsaw:Do not attempt to stop chain with hands.
Windex:Do not spray in eyes.
McDonald's Coffee:Warning - Contents may be hot.
Bayer Aspirin:Do not take if allergic to aspirin.
Liquid Plummer:Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages.
Miller Lite:Consumption of alcoholic beverages impairs your ability to drive a car or operate machinery, and may cause health problems.
Komatsu Floodlight:This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark.
Tonyang Lighting Screwdriver:Use 3 pieces of batteries on 4.
Moet White Star Champagne:Warning: Remove label before placing in microwave.
Energizer AAA 4 Pack:If swallowed, promptly see doctor.
Boot's Childrens Cough Medicine:Do not drive a car or run machinery.
Fritos:You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
Mr. Bubbles:Keep out of reach of children.
Mark and Spencer's Bread PuddingProduct will be hot after heating.
Craftsman Push MowerWarning: Do not attempt to remove blade while lawnmower is running or plugged into an outlet.
Sainsbury Peanuts (Read Comments)Warning: This product contains nuts.