Wednesday, November 01, 2006

hUMOR For Nov. 1st

Haircut

The supervisor of my work section recently made a casual comment
about my shaggy mane of hair.

He then went on to extol the virtues of a good haircut, which, he
insisted, makes an elderly man look younger and a younger man seem
more mature.

"How would a haircut make a middle-aged man like me appear?" I asked.

"Still employed," was his answer.
+++++++++++++++++++
At the hardware store where I work, our manager was writing out a bill when
he turned to me and asked, "Hey, what are
these nuts worth?"

A new clerk looked up and said, "I thought we were getting seven bucks and
hour?"
+++++++++++++++++++
A steam locomotive passing through Poland one night was running low on coal.
The engineer said to his fireman, "We're coming to a town, let's stop and
send the porter out to get more coal. Can you see the name of the town on
the depot sign?"

The fireman replied, "It appears to be Danzig in the dark."

And the engineer shouted, "Buy coal, Porter!"
+++++++++++++++++++
The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new
office, and his staff was helping transport many of the
items.

I sat the display skeleton in the front of my car, his bony
arm across the back of my seat. I hadn't considered the
drive across town. At one traffic light, the stares of the
people in the car beside me became obvious, and I looked
across and explained, "I'm delivering him to my doctor's
office."

The other driver leaned out of his window. "I hate to tell
you, lady," he said, "but I think it's too late!"