Adoption
The couple was delighted when their long wait to adopt a baby came to an
end. The adoption center called and told them that there was a wonderful
Russian baby boy available. The couple accepted him without hesitation.
On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped by the local college
so they each could enroll in night courses.
After they filled out the forms, the registration clerk inquired, "What
ever possessed you to study Russian?"
The couple said proudly, "We just adopted a Russian baby. In a year or so,
when he begins to talk, we want to be able to understand him."
**********
One Christmas, a parent decreed that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties.
As a result their grandmother never received acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given.
The next year things were different, however.
"The children came over in person to thank me," the grandparent told a friend triumphantly.
"How wonderful!" the friend exclaimed. "What do you think caused the change in behavior?"
"Oh, that's easy," the grandmother replied. "This year I didn't sign the checks."
**********
The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS.
He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES.
The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read...
MAIN ENTRANCE.
*********
Thanks to Larry Clott for today's CleanPun.
The Sunday after Christmas, the Sunday School teacher told her students about an angel appearing to Joseph in a dream, warning him about danger to the baby Jesus and telling him how to escape from it. After the story time, the students were given an opportunity to draw a picture about the story. Most of the pictures were predictable, but Johnny's had an odd element in it.
"Johnny, I see Joseph and Mary with the baby Jesus on a donkey, but what is that following the donkey?
"It's the flea, teacher."
"What flea?" asked the teacher.
To which the boy faithfully repeated the Bible verse: "Take Mary and Jesus and flea to Egypt. There's Mary; there's Jesus; and there's the flea."