That Would Explain It
IT worker at a small hospital gets a tech-support call from the lab
department. "Apparently they had been having trouble faxing reports
for a few days," says the tech. "They finally decided to call me to
see if I could fix the problem."
He heads down to the department, asks the usual troubleshooting
questions and scrolls through the log entries on the PC that reports
are faxed from. There's just one error message, about a file not
found. The tech reinstalls the fax service and tries faxing again. No luck.
Then he remembers that he's working with a fax modem, and that there
might be a clue in the sound coming over the wire. Not surprisingly,
the lab personnel have turned the volume off so they don't have to
listen to the modem's screech all day.
The tech turns it back on and tries faxing one more time. "After I
stopped laughing, I asked the lab manager to come in and listen."
Sure enough, what they hear is: "We're sorry, your phone number has
been disconnected."
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Weird News
Man's wasp plan destroys garage, car
FARDAL, Norway (UPI) -- A Fardal,
The elderly man said he poured lighter fluid on a rag and lit it in an attempt to smoke the wasps out of their nest, but the flames spread to the woodpile that held the nest and ignited a blaze that took down the entire garage, Aftenposten reported Thursday.
"Maybe using lighter fluid wasn't such a good idea, but it was an accident all the same and the wasps are gone," the man said.
He said he is waiting to hear from his insurance company to see if the loss of his garage and car will///
Conn. firefighters discover pot factory
Police said four residents of the home -- identified as Leslie Defrancesco, 29, Ethan Mayo, 33, James Leclair, 33 and Michael Mikiens, 32 -- were arrested after officers seized 40 grams of marijuana, a ventilation system, heat lamps, fans and paraphernalia used to smoke the plant from the house, The Hartford Courant reported
Acting Fire Capt. Christopher Zak said firefighters arrived on the scene after a heat lamp caused burlap netting covering the marijuana plants to ignite. He said the fire had burned out before firefighters arrived, but they discovered the closet during a search of the home.
All four suspects were charged with operating a drug factory, cultivation of a controlled substance, possession of drug paraphernalia and conspiracy. Leclair and Mikiens were also charged with possession of marijuana and possession of marijuana within 1,500 feet of public housing.
The suspects were released and are scheduled to appear in court Aug. 26.
be covered.
///
Cake mix powder sparks evacuation
Crews from the
Maria Barrios, a support services operator for Tenet, said four employees who were near the envelope when it was opened were quarantined while the crews investigated.
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Mis-Step
I recall a time when my son was about 18 months old. I had
him strapped into a backpack and was rushing to catch the
bus. Apparently I mis-stepped and fell down an entire flight
of stairs (13 to be exact). I was bruised and bleeding and
had torn my jeans ... but my main concern was, naturally,
for my child.
My fears were alleviated, though, when from behind me I
heard a gleeful giggle followed by, "Again!"
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The Barber
A man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to
"We're taking TWA," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"
"TWA?" exclaimed the barber. "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are rude, and they're always late. So, where are you staying in
"We'll be at the downtown International Marriott."
"That dump! That's the worst hotel in the city. The rooms are small, the service is surly and they're overpriced. So, whatcha doing when you get there?"
"We're going to go to see the
"That's rich," laughed the barber. "You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."
A month later, the man again came in for his regular haircut. The barber asked him about his trip to
"It was wonderful," explained the man, "not only were we on time in one of TWA's brand new planes, but it was overbooked and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a beautiful 28 year old stewardess who waited on me hand and foot. And the hotel - it was great! They'd just finished a $25 million remodeling job and now it's the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us the presidential suite at no extra charge!"
"Well," muttered the barber, "I know you didn't get to see the Pope."
"Actually, we were quite lucky, for as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder and explained that the Pope likes to personally meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke to
"Really?" asked the Barber. "What'd he say?"
"He said, 'Where'd you get the lousy haircut?'"
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Doorbell
A man is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach. After watching the boy's efforts for some time, the man moves closer to the boy's position.
He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder, leans over and gives the doorbell a solid ring.
Crouching down to the childs level, the man smiles benevolently and asks, "And now what, my little man?"
The boy replies, "Now we run!"
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The Calf
A farmer was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his four year old son standing at the fence, soaking in the whole event.
The man thought to himself, "Great. He's four and I'm gonna have to start explaining the birds and the bees. No need to jump the gun - I'll just let him ask, and I'll answer."
After everything was over, the man walked over to his son and said, "Well son, do you have any questions?"
"Just one," gasped the still wide-eyed lad.
"How fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?"