One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the rascally behavior that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check it out. So he called one of His angels and sent the angel to Earth for a time. When he returned, he told God, "Yes, it is bad on Earth; 95% are misbehaving and 5% are not." God thought for a moment and said, "Maybe I had better send down a second angel to get another opinion." So God called another angel and sent him to Earth for a time too. When the angel returned he went to God and said, "Yes, it's true-the Earth is in decline; 95% are misbehaving and 5% are being good." God was not pleased. So He decided to E-mail the 5% that were good, because He wanted to encourage them. Give them a little something to help them keep going. Do you know what that E-mail said? No? I didn't get one either.
Saturday, August 07, 2004
On this day in 1774
On this day in 1774 Betsy Ross asked a group of colonists for their opinion of the flag she had made;
thus creating the first flag poll.
thus creating the first flag poll.
SIGNS THAT YOUR LIFESTYLE IS UNHEALTHY
SIGNS THAT YOUR LIFESTYLE IS UNHEALTHY
- You go to give blood and two gallons of pure lard come out.
- You get winded from exercising your right to vote.
- When you go to McDonald's, they give you your usual table.
- The roaches in your apartment go on rent strike until you fix the rat problem.
- When your teeth are so yellow, you can't tell where they end and the mashed corn begins.
- Your blood type is "Smirnoff."
- Your speed dial includes The Mayo Clinic, the Betty Ford Center, and the Psychic Friends Network.
- 911 has you on their speed dial.
- You go to give blood and two gallons of pure lard come out.
- You get winded from exercising your right to vote.
- When you go to McDonald's, they give you your usual table.
- The roaches in your apartment go on rent strike until you fix the rat problem.
- When your teeth are so yellow, you can't tell where they end and the mashed corn begins.
- Your blood type is "Smirnoff."
- Your speed dial includes The Mayo Clinic, the Betty Ford Center, and the Psychic Friends Network.
- 911 has you on their speed dial.
documentary film makers
Two wildlife documentary film makers were filming a wild lion in Africa. They both notice that the lion is about to attack them. One of the men puts down his camera and slowing changes from his boots into a pair of running shoes. The other man see this and says, "You know you can't outrun a lion don't you?"
The other man reply's "The way I see it, all I have to do is keep ahead of you and I'll be all right!"
The other man reply's "The way I see it, all I have to do is keep ahead of you and I'll be all right!"
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