Caution
A pharmacy major was taking a course in Dispensing. One day they were
discussing the various labels affixed to prescription containers, such as,
"Take with food," and "Take with water."
At the end of class, the professor passed out a few sample labels.
Days later he noticed that one member of the class had struck one of them
onto his chemistry textbook. It read: "Caution: May cause extreme drowsiness."
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
A parish priest
A parish priest was being honored at a dinner on the 25th anniversary of his arrival in that parish. A leading local politician, who was a member of the congregation, was chosen to make the presentation and give a little speech at the dinner, but he was delayed in traffic. Sooo.....the priest decided to say his own few words while they waited.
"You will understand," he said, "the seal of the confessional, can never be broken. However, I got my first impressions of this parish from the first confession I heard here. I can only hint vaguely about this, but when I came here 25 years ago, I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first chap who entered my confessional told me how he had stolen a television set and, when stopped by the police, had almost murdered the officer. Further, he told me he had embezzled money from his place of business and had an affair with his boss's wife. I was appalled. But as the days went on I knew that my people were not all like that, and I had, indeed come to, a fine parish full of understanding and loving people."
Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies for being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and give his talk.
"I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived in this parish," said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first one to go to him in confession."
"You will understand," he said, "the seal of the confessional, can never be broken. However, I got my first impressions of this parish from the first confession I heard here. I can only hint vaguely about this, but when I came here 25 years ago, I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first chap who entered my confessional told me how he had stolen a television set and, when stopped by the police, had almost murdered the officer. Further, he told me he had embezzled money from his place of business and had an affair with his boss's wife. I was appalled. But as the days went on I knew that my people were not all like that, and I had, indeed come to, a fine parish full of understanding and loving people."
Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies for being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and give his talk.
"I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived in this parish," said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first one to go to him in confession."
Two bowling teams
Two bowling teams, one made up of all blondes and one of all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend tournament in Atlantic City.
The brunette team rode in the bottom deck of the bus and the blonde team rode on the top level. The brunette team down below was whooping it up and having a great time when one of them realized she didn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs. She decided to go up and investigate.
When the brunette reached the top, she found all the blondes frozen in fear, staring straight ahead at the road and clutching the seats in front of them. The brunette asked, "What is going on up here? We're having a great time downstairs!"
One of the blondes said, "Yeah, but you've got a driver!"
The brunette team rode in the bottom deck of the bus and the blonde team rode on the top level. The brunette team down below was whooping it up and having a great time when one of them realized she didn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs. She decided to go up and investigate.
When the brunette reached the top, she found all the blondes frozen in fear, staring straight ahead at the road and clutching the seats in front of them. The brunette asked, "What is going on up here? We're having a great time downstairs!"
One of the blondes said, "Yeah, but you've got a driver!"
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