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Where?
Torrential rainstorms were knocking down power lines all over town.
That meant, as a customer service rep for the electric company, I was
dispatching repairmen right and left. When one lineman called a
customer to get her exact address, he was told, "I'm at Post Office
Box 99." The weary lineman replied, "Ma'am, I'll be coming to you in
a truck, not an envelope."
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A very elderly gentleman (mid-nineties), very well dressed, hair well groomed, great-looking suit, flower in his lapel, smelling slightly of a good after-shave, presenting a well-looked-after image, walks into an upscale cocktail lounge.
Seated at the bar is an elderly looking lady (mid-eighties). The gentleman walks over, sits along side of her, orders a drink, takes a sip, turns to her, and says, "So tell me, do I come here often?"
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Seniors' Special
We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the "Seniors' Special" was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $1.99. "Sounds good," my wife said. "But I don't want the eggs." "Then I'll have to charge you two dollars and forty-nine cents because you're ordering a la carte," the waitress warned her. "You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?" my wife asked incredulously. "Then I'll take the Special." "How do you want your eggs?" "Raw and in the shell!" my wife replied.
She took the two eggs home.
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Here is today's CleanQuote.
"After you've heard two eyewitness accounts of an automobile accident, you begin to worry about history."
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Thanks to Lee Quinn for today's Illustration. - Customer Service
A diner was agitated that the waiter had brought him no spoon with his coffee. "This coffee," he said loud enough for most of the other patrons to hear, "is going to be pretty hot to stir with my fingers."
The waiter reddened, made a hasty retreat to the kitchen and returned shortly with another cup of coffee.
"This one isn't so hot, sir," he beamed.
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Blonde joke
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his
attractive blond female neighbor came out of the house
and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then
slammed it shut & stormed back into the house.
A little later she came out of her house again went to
the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut
again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the
man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came
again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then
slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is
something wrong?"
To which she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid
computer keeps saying, 'You've got mail'."