Down South Bumper Stickers
- I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
- Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill
them.
- BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
- I got a gun for my wife, best trade I ever made.
- So you're a feminist...Isn't that cute!
- I'm just driving this way to tork you off.
- Keep honking, I'm reloading.
***********************************
ID Required
My friend Bev and her husband were fixing their roof.
As soon as they started, they realized they needed more
supplies, so Bev grabbed the checkbook, jumped into her
car, and drove the 45 miles to the nearest lumberyard.
After gathering the items she needed, Bev went up to the
cashier and wrote a check. "I really need to see a photo
ID." the clerk said.
"I don't have one on me," Bev replied.
The cashier called over the manager who examined the check.
Then the manager looked up and asked Bev, "Who is the Avon
lady in your town?"
Puzzled, Bev responded, "Maxine Thompson."
"I think you can take her check," the smiling manager said
to the cashier. "Maxine is my grandmother."
*******************************
George Washington
Few people realize that George Washington was originally
from Texas -- West Texas, to be exact. The family had a lone
mesquite tree in their yard. One day George cut it down.
When his father came home, he saw the tree was cut down and
asked George if he had cut down the lone mesquite tree.
George said, "Father, I cannot tell a lie. I cut down the
mesquite tree."
Whereupon, his father called out to Mrs. Washington, "Get
packed, dear. We are moving to Virginia. George is never
going to make it in Texas if he can't tell a lie."