2 dumb fishermen decided to rent a boat on a lake, and after
fishing for 4 hours at various places around the lake with no
luck at all, they decided to try one more spot before calling it
quits,
Suddenly things started to happen, and they caught their limit inside of twenty minutes. Clem said, "Hey we should mark this spot, so next time we'll know where to come,"
"Good idea" says Roscoe and he took out a can of spray paint and made a large X on the floor of the boat to mark the spot.
"That's stupid" says Clem "Now anyone who rents this boat will know where to fish."
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My brother Vern is a piece of skin stretched over an appetite.
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"Good Old Days"
Grandpa was always going on about the good old days, and the lower cost of living, in particular. "When I was a kid, my mom could send me to the store, and I'd get a salami, two pints of milk, 6 oranges, 2 loaves o' bread, a magazine, and some new blue jeans... all for a dollar!!"
Then Grandpa said sadly, "You can't DO that anymore..... they got those video cameras everywhere you look."
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Oneliner
"What makes airport security think they can find something in my wife's purse when she can't?"
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"More Name Puns"
More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....
PROFESSION: NAME
Minister's daughter: Faith
Day-trader's daughter: Hope
Televangelist's daughter: Charity
Geneticist's son: Gene
Espresso vendor's son: Joe
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While I was working as a pediatric nurse, I had the
difficult assignment of giving immunization shots to
children. One day I entered the examining room to give
four-year-old Lizzie her shot.
"NO! NO! NO!" she screamed.
"Lizzie," her mother scolded. "That's not polite behavior."
At that, the girl yelled even louder, "NO, THANK YOU! NO,
THANK YOU! NO, THANK YOU!"