"THINGS TO REMEMBER....EVERYDAY"

"THINGS TO REMEMBER....EVERYDAY"

If you want your dreams to come true, don't oversleep.The smallest good deed is better than the grandest intention.Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important.The best vitamin for making friends....B1.The commandments of God are not multiple choice.The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.Minds are like parachutes...they function only when open.Ideas won't work unless YOU do.One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.One who lacks the courage to start has already finished.The heaviest thing to carry is a grudge.Don't learn safety rules by accident.We lie the loudest when we lie to ourselves.Jumping to conclusions can be bad exercise.A turtle makes progress when it sticks it's head out.One thing you can give and still keep...is your word.A friend walks in when everyone else walks out.AND FINALLY...The pursuit of happiness is the chase of a lifetime!!!If you're too open-minded... your brains will fall out.

The Pumpkin

The Pumpkin

A lady recently baptized was asked by a co-worker what it was like to be a Christian. She replied, 'It's like being a pumpkin: God saves you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off you may have gotten from the other pumpkins. Then he cuts the top off and scoops out all the yucky stuff. He removes the seeds of doubt, hate, greed, etc., then He carves you a new smiling face and puts His light inside of you to shine for all the world to see. Passed on to me from another pumpkin.

No Place Like Home

No Place Like Home

While I was dining out with my children, a man came over to our table, and
we started talking.
He asked where my kids go to school. I told him we home-schooled them.
With a raised eyebrow, he asked if my husband is the sole breadwinner for
our family.
I said, "No, I also work ... out of our home."
Then, noticing our two-month-old son, he mentioned that his daughter had
just had a baby, and he wondered what hospital our son was born in.
"He was born at home," I answered.
The man looked at me, then said, "Wow, you don't get out much, do you?"

Here is today's CleanPun.

Here is today's CleanPun.

A business man called a travel agent and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, the travel agent reminded him he needed a visa.
"Oh, no, I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those."
The travel agent double checked, and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When the travel agent told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and everytime they have accepted my American Express or MasterCard."